From Larry Wohlgemuth…

Republicans have been declaring for more than a decade that we now live in post-racial (and by implication prejudicial) America. Actually it should be stated as post-racial/prejudicial, because that insinuates that we have moved past all petty prejudices to a point of frank, open and honest discussion on issues that affect us all. That means we’ve moved past bigotry based on nationality, gender, religion or any of the myriad of preferences which identify us as individuals. It implies that no one any longer looks down his or her nose at anyone else.

I would like to believe it to be true, but the racial/prejudicial period ended too easily for me to accept it on its face. When something has been as institutionalize as have our prejudices, it generally ends with thrashing about and gnashing of teeth rather than a whimper. Yet the Republicans have declared it, so it must be so, right? It begs the question, who did the Republicans think they could convince that we had entered this utopist and idyllic post-racial/prejudicial world?

I wondered if they are talking about 30-year-old Anthony Hill of Winnsboro, SC, or possibly James Byrd, Jr. of Jasper, Texas when they refer to this as a post-racial society. Hill was dragged to death behind a pickup truck driven by 19-year-old Gregory Collins of Newberry, and Byrd was dragged to death in 1998 behind a pickup truck by three men, Shawn Allen Berry, Lawrence Russell Brewer and John William King. I’m sure that the fact these two murders took place in what were considered as highly racist states in pre-post-racial/prejudicial times is merely a coincidence, just as was the fact that the victims were black and the perpetrators were white. This is just how things play out in a post-racial/prejudicial society.

Then there’s Dr. George Tiller, gunned down in his church for having the audacity to perform abortions, a procedure that is legal in the United States. However we can be sure in this post-racial/prejudicial society that a mentally deficient man like Scott Roeder would never have considered Dr. Tiller’s vocational activities when he walked into that church with a loaded gun and shot the doctor dead in front of the congregation. Once again, we can be sure that this didn’t happen because of prejudice, because the Republicans have assured us that we are now a post-racial/prejudicial society.

And we have the good Dr. Laura, who although she’s white felt entitled to use the N-word 11 times in a five-minute span on her radio program because black comedians on HBO and Showtime do it. You see, in a post-racial/prejudicial society we’re all free to use any words we choose, because we couldn’t possibly be making a racist innuendo. No, we’re simply exercising our First Amendment rights, and besides, we know this wasn’t a racist remark because Dr. Laura told us so several times right after she said it. If you can’t trust Dr. Laura in these post-racial/prejudicial times, then who can you trust?

Finally there are the cases of Lawrence King, Matthew Shepard, Danny Overstreet, Philip Walsted, Sakia Gunn, Glenn Kopitske, Scotty Joe Weaver, Daniel Fetty, Jason Gage, Ryan Keith Skipper, Roberto Duncanson, Sean William Kennedy, Steven Parrish, Lateisha Green and Seaman August Provost, among many others, who were killed, but not for being gay. It seems that their attackers admitted that the victims’ homosexuality was the impetus for the attack, but in a post-racial/prejudicial society we have to take their admissions with a grain of salt. After all, they can’t possibly be aware of the post-racial/prejudicial dynamics that are taking place around them, making their attacks of the non-racial/prejudicial type. I mean, even the case of Ronnie Antonio Paris Jr., a three-year-old boy killed by his father because he was afraid his son might be gay, that’s just the way straights and gays interact in the post-racial/prejudicial era.

Okay, it’s pretty clear that we are not in a post-racial/prejudicial time based on what’s happening around us. So what’s going on? I mean, why are the Republicans working so hard to convince us that something exists when it obviously does not?

In this country there are only 5%, maybe 10%, of the people that are actually Republicans, and the rest are posers although they don’t realize it. To be a Republican means being a capitalist, and only a tiny fraction of people fit the description. The problem is, part of being a Republican is being able to look down your nose at other people, and the vast majority of the Republican Party are just working assholes like you and me, so there was some work that had to be done. It was necessary to create a significant enough underclass so that the idiot who makes $10 per hour working on an assembly line and watches Glen Beck can actually feel superior to somebody, and therefore a member of the Republican club. Minorities fill that bill nicely, thank you very much, but as the line of separation blurs so does the ability of the moronic masses in the Republican Party to look down on someone. Feeling superior is a crucial tenet to making the pseudo-Republicans believe they really are part of the club.

So how do they make this work? They behave even more racist and prejudiced than in the past, and then repeat over and over again that this is how things are in a post-racial/prejudicial world. They know if they say it long and loudly enough, and nobody objects, there’s a chance people will start to believe it. The problem is that genie is out of the bottle and they can’t regain control, try as they might. If the illusion of superiority ever leaves the working class schlemiels of the Republican Party they might quit participating, or even worse become Democrats. It’s a lot of work making a guy who earns $10 an hour believe he’s in some way superior to a brown person with a PhD.

So the Republicans will continue lest 70% of their party come to the realization that they are superior to no one. It would be a devastating blow for them. As a result we can expect to see more blatant racism followed by still more disingenuous, wide-eyed denials that racism was the intent. Without it their party shatters into 1 million pieces.

The one good thing is that the Republican demographic is dying, literally, and I have to be honest about the fact that it bothers me little. There are some people that just don’t deserve to waste our oxygen.

While listening to Dr. Laura’s racist meltdown the other day I was reminded of a recurring episode from my childhood involving my brother. Like all siblings we competed with each other, which inevitably led to physical confrontation. Being two years older and considerably larger, they usually ended with me imposing my physical will on him, and he would run crying to mom.

He’d be screaming all the way that I hurt him, and my response would be, “That didn’t hurt, that didn’t hurt,” all the while telling him to be quiet. Then there was the moment of truth where mom would listen to the facts and make her decision. My brother’s claims and my protestations had precious little to do with her judgment. Unable to appreciate that our tiny house allowed her to hear everything that transpired, we’d both state our cases passionately. Generally her rulings were just, although there was a time or two that she missed. Regardless, neither his claims nor my protests ultimately had much impact on her ruling, but what I learned was I didn’t get to decide whether my actions were hurtful. It begs the question, what the hell makes Dr. Laura believe she gets to decide whether her behavior was racist?

Dr. Laura is a hate filled, homophobic, xenophobic, religious wingnut, titty-baring bitch, and I’m working very hard to be as kind as possible. She’s the spawn of Satan sent to cause immeasurable pain and suffering on the world. That said, let’s look at her actions.

On the radio she goes into a complete meltdown, using a pejorative racial epithet repeatedly, deluded that she was helping a human being of the race she was denigrating. Eleven times in five minutes she used the N-word, rationalizing that since black comedians on HBO and Showtime use it that she should be able to use it, too. Giving her the benefit of the doubt, we’d suggest that she was just trying to open a heretofore off-limits dialogue. The thing is, when it comes to hatred it’s never reasonable to give a person the benefit of the doubt. However there was one thing that I did find amusing in this reprehensible display of ignorance and bigotry.

When the caller, an African-American woman who was obviously timid and self-conscious, finally mustered the courage to confront Dr. Laura, she responded much as I did all those years ago. She exclaimed, “That’s not racist, that’s not racist,” as if it was her decision to make. Just as I’d done all those years ago, she was living with the misconception that ultimately it was her right to determine whether her actions were inappropriate. The difference is that I was only seven years old, and based on the crevices in her face she has to be at least 80, and should know better. The sad truth is, despite being a psychologist, she actually believed that it was her right to decide whether her behavior was hateful and racist. The problem is, we’re seeing that same conduct from the borderline personalities on the right every day.

Look at the teabaggers and you see this dynamic in action all the time. They walk the streets with signs depicting Barack Obama dressed as a tribal African with a bone in his nose, or one that reads “Monkey See, Monkey Spend,” yet they act like none of us are capable of reaching our own conclusions. They protest vociferously any suggestion that they might be racist, xenophobic or homophobic, all the while acting racist, xenophobic and homophobic.

It’s like walking in on your three-year-old who has cookie all over his face and hands, and when you ask him he denies having been in the cookie jar. You know he’s lying, and he knows he’s lying, yet somehow in his tiny, marginally functioning intellect he’s convinced that he’s really telling the truth. The problem is that we have a large number of adults, capable of doing adult damage, who are functioning intellectually and emotionally at the level of a three-year-old. The question becomes, what are we to do about it?

Since I already started this by being less than politically correct a judgmental asshole, I don’t see any sense in ending it any other way. If someone was destroying his life with addictions to alcohol, drugs, gambling or sex, we’d feel compelled to intervene on his behalf. We wouldn’t allow him to careen out of control without throwing him a life preserver. We need to do the same with Dr. Laura and the teabaggers.

I propose a stupidity intervention. It’s time we approach them with our concerns that they are so totally ignorant that we’re worried they might forget to breathe, and that they need to get help. The first thing we’d do is use parental controls on their televisions and lock them out of FOX News, forcing them to get their information from a variety of other sources. The second would be to require them to attend a class about the Constitution of the United States. Finally, and most importantly, we’d demand they spend 10 hours a week as a minority at a gathering of people from another race or ethnic background. I know these are extreme measures, but we live in desperate times.

If you have someone that you’re worried about, please don’t stand by and allow them to slide into the abyss. Confront them and tell them that you really wish they would go for help. It’s the only merciful thing to do.

From Larry Wohlgemuth…

Throughout human history, race has been our most defining characteristic. By extension, race has consistently produced powerful forms of judgment and continues to do so today. Although the concept of race scientifically does not exist and is purely a social phenomenon, the social reality of race permeates every part of human life. More than anything, visible immediacy perpetuates its superiority as a master status and the lines of racial division are systemically ingrained within our thought patterns from the moment we join the empirical rabble of humankind. RELATIVITY OnLine’s Indonesian correspondent Rezwan, starkly recounts his past’s perspective of being a Bangladeshi living in Germany – a country with dark past of xenophobia and fear. His words remind us all that although we have come so very far in terms of race relations, we are still a long way from home.  

I wrote earlier about how Roland Koch, the governor of the western state of Hesse in Germany stirred an uproar with his anti-immigrant rhetorics possibly as an election strategy (from 2008).

The Spiegel Online International recently did a soul searching on “Germany’s homegrown intolerance“. Spiegel Online editor David Crossland, who was born in Bonn to English parents argued, “rather than rail against ‘criminal young foreigners,’ the country ought to be doing more to welcome its minorities“.

He cited the racial discriminationshe faced for speaking in English in U-Bahn (underground) although being a white person and opines:

“Maybe it’s the Germans’ romantic yearning for purity and cleanliness, for a “Heile Welt,” a “Perfect World,” that renders them prone to a collective xenophobia. This nation of dog lovers goes for pure breeds.”
….
“So instead of telling its immigrants not to slaughter sheep in their kitchens, Germany would be well advised to be nicer to its immigrants. Like it or not, they’re here to stay.”

It sparked a lot of reactions. In the same article the Spiegel Online International announced that they are collecting the experiences of foreigners living in Germany — both good and bad. And here a Pandora’s box was opened. More and more readers talk of Germany’s invisible Xenophobia and it ain’t pretty.

Spiegel’s first batch of readers opinions revealed horrid portrayals of silent xenophobia and some questions which the Germans probably have never thought of this way. We also look at some examples of foreigners living without such discrimination and how Germans view it.

“I was exposed to a subtle yet stubborn kind of racism on a daily basis. This mostly takes the form of social exclusion — I always felt that I am not and will never be allowed to become a normal member of society, despite holding a promising academic record and decent linguistic skills.” – A Chinese scholar from Munich.

“I have a German name, I have a German passport, but I look Asian, and therefore am a foreigner.” – Veronica

“One more issue that I feel is a barrier to any kind of integration is the fact that almost no Germans that I knew had friends of a different culture or skin color — the exception being North Americans, North Europeans and Australians, etc. Even so-called liberal, ‘tolerant’ people simply did not have foreigners in their circles of acquaintance. Friendships and relationships are essential to any type of integration, and as long as the Germans keep immigrants at arm’s length, the immigrants will never feel like they belong.” Yvonne Jacoby from Ireland

“I have come across some of the finest individuals in Germany, and the opposite too. It’s extremely hard for a foreigner to find out whether a German likes him/her or not. I hope most of the foreigners would agree if I say life for a foreigner is like that of Satan in heaven — you have been admitted into the country but not actually into the society.” – Madhu Balan from India

“I do have German friends and a German wife and a lot of Germans are kind and nice people. But I never feel like I belong to this place because of my skin color. And even the nicest Germans will often ask, when I say I am American: “But what are you really?” – Mike Silva from USA

“In some parts of Germany I would not like to have dark skin — sad, don’t you think?” – An ex-British soldier.

“If my friend, who is white, crosses a street when the light is red, she is in a hurry. And if I do the same, someone is waiting to say “schwarze Schlampe” (“black slut”) or something similar.” – An Indian Student in Berlin

On the other hand some foreigners said that Germans were helpful to them and the extent of racism and xenophobia in Germany is often exaggerated. Some opined that Germany is not perfect and there are more hate crimes reported in many countries whereas only few Germany.

A German man with a Polish wife shared the treatment his wife and a South African friend faced and opined:

“The only chance I see for success is the integration of our society into a European society as a whole where immigration, cross-border movements and ‘foreignness’ are considered to be assets for a functioning society.“

An Indian scholar defends Germans and suggests:

“They just expect that people should at least speak and understand their language and culture. Germany needs to do more to have the best brains from around the world. This is where the future lies.“

Read the Spiegel Online article for details.

In the second batch of reader opinionsin Spiegel a discovery comes from a German who is living outside of Germany for five years:

“The kind of discrimination that immigrants in Germany face is already deeply rooted in the system and accepted as the norm to such an extent that most people will not notice it. This discrimination may not be apparent to someone who is living in Germany and surrounded by it every day, yet not affected by it.“

In my town there are a lot of immigrant children of my age, from Turkey, Russia, Italy and many other countries. Yet how many of them went to a “Gymnasium” (university-track high school — Ed.) like I did? The sad answer is not a single one. My entire high school class consisted of German, white, middle-class kids who were, like me, oblivious to the diversity of people living around them.

It happens all around us — it is just a matter of opening your eyes to it.

Here are some examples confirming it:

“I discovered, while procuring my residency papers, a higher benchmark was set for my documents than those of my white American friends who were kind enough to compare their experience with mine.” – A Haitian American

“My wife, in spite of being a European citizen, was given a permit as if she was an Indian wife and she was not allowed to work any more. When we inquired to the Ausländerbehörde (foreigners’ office) about her getting a Freizügigkeitsbescheinigung (‘freedom of movement’ permit, issued to EU citizens living in Germany) we were told that she had lost all rights as an EU citizen by marrying a third-country national and she would now be considered as an alien’s wife, not as an EU citizen.” – An Indian scholar married to a Lithuanian girl (working in Germany).

“When I first got pregnant, I couldn’t believe the look on one of the nurses’ face when she looked at my insurance card and saw that we were not Germans. She immediately started hinting to my face that we were here making a great living and stealing their jobs away, while they were struggling with recession.” -Andreaa Sepi from Romania

And some reality the Germans perhaps do not consider:

“Even the most cosmopolitan of my German friends could not conceive that I might plan to stay in the country after graduation. For them, it was unthinkable that a foreigner would come to study in Germany and legally stay on to work. (After graduation I moved to the United States and use my German education to make money from an American company. Too bad for the German tax-payer.)” – A Brazilian

“Germans probably travel more than any other nationalities, and yet in their own country they act as if they’ve never seen people of color.” – name withheld

My suggestion to Germans who really want to see integration work, is simple: Talk to a foreigner! Wherever you are, on the bus, walking down the street, don’t hesitate to talk to a foreigner. Make us feel welcome, just a little nod and a short hello would suffice.

“Immigration has always been part of Germany’s history, in one way or another — be it the Huguenots in the 17th century or Russian Jews after the pogroms in Russia in the 19th century — only that a lot of Germans aren’t aware of it. I blame the politicians and the media in Germany for doing so little to promote immigration and integration, to show how society can benefit from immigration — where are, for instance, the Turkish TV presenters?” – Martin Sauter, a German

While we also see some counterpoints:

“Germans have the right to model their own country and culture. The same is true for Saudi Arabia with its non-tolerance of Christians, and India with its discriminatory caste system or Japan with its homogeneous ethnicity.” – An American

“There is always one option for those who do not like it: Go home. No one is keeping them here or in any country where they do not feel wanted.” – Paul Sanders

“Maybe Germany, including the SPIEGEL, should realize that Germany is not a special country but average, and that the phenomena you discuss here are not specifically German but human. It’s called in-group-preference and out-group-avoidance. I’m afraid we’re not going to get totally rid of that anywhere in the world.” – A German living in Canada.

“The emphasis (in the debate on “foreign” criminals (more…)) should not be on the word “foreign”; rather, it should be on the word “criminal.” If the criminal element — regardless of age — chooses not to respect the laws of their country of adoption, then they should be deported, pure and simple. The tax payer should not support this ilk.” – Vera Gottlieb.

My view to this debate is that any criminal foreign or local should be tried under law. So why the fuss about deporting foreigners? What do you do with the local criminals? I think Ms. Vera do not know the asylum laws in Germany which grants political asylums to people from other countries. Some of those granted are fugitives from the rule of law of their own countries. Perhaps the issue of human rights come into question then. What an oxymoron!

I like to end this roundup with an American’s words:

“Here in the States, the history of prejudice is different, the effects just as constant, but the origin similar: fear of that which is different. This fear breeds hatred and violence, sometimes planned and carried out over time, at other times opportunistic and random. Passively and actively, it is then passed to the next generation.“

Xenophobia, racism, and extreme nationalism or regionalism, are all so ugly because the potential for these exists in all our hearts.

Uganda‘s Arinaitwe Rugyendo gets straight to the point; whites and blacks have issues with one another. In terms of Africa and the West, whites have told and continue to tell blacks what is moral, right, and just; continue to import aid, while at the same time importing dependency and destruction. The Global Village is changing things and the voices of Africa, like those of RELATIVITY OnLine’s Arinaitwe Rugyendo, are standing up to be heard.

When David Anthony Hohol, dropped me an email two weeks ago, asking me to contribute to ‘Relativity Online,’ I was surprised.

Surprised because; ‘how could a white request a black for a contribution to his own idea?’

In our cultural context and also owing to our colonial history and its legacies, whites are viewed as omniscient species who regard anything from Africa as ‘trash.’

Their perspective is supposed to be the global trend of things. They are the ones who export, nurture and consolidate democracy.

They are the ones who have the right to divide the world into moral and immoral; poor and rich; dictatorial and free; terrorist and moderate, etc.

But David convinced me beyond these socially constructed biases.

He convinced me to buy into his idea with a flattering sweetener; ‘I bought a copy of Red Pepper (my newspaper) while I was there and enjoyed it.’

That tickled me a bit. He had traveled to my country and enjoyed every bit of it and appreciated what it has to offer for the rest of the world. I and four other young colleagues own Red Pepper (www.redpepper.ug ) and it has fast become Uganda’s leading daily tabloid.

In our exchange, David revealed he had visited Uganda and had particularly fell in love with the country’s rare Mountain Gorillas, found not anywhere in the world except in the densely impenetrable forest of Bwindi, in the South West.

It was this visit that prompted David to start a non-profit on-line magazine, where writers from around the global would ‘share their perspectives on life and living.’

“I am looking to tear down stereotypes and build bridges between cultures,” he pressed on.

“Tales and discussions of daily life in your country are part of what I am looking for, as it is often a misunderstood and mysterious part of the world. On a bigger scale, what perceptions do people have of your part of the world that is wrong? If you could stand in front of a group of people from the other side of the world, what would you want them to know about you and your country?  What might they be surprised by?” he asked me.

From this, I realized that the world has changed. It has become a small village where, for survival’s sake, every opinion matters. At last, here was a ‘foreigner’ with a strong passion to tell the ‘African story’ to the rest of the world.David’s concept enriches the relativism debate with fresh labels that rule the global village. These are the rules that take cognizance of the fact that even the most misunderstood have something to offer. And that most importantly, even a dead clock is always correct twice day. The world has changed. Technology has broken barriers. Quantity has become quality. Interpretation of what is democratic has been democratized and ‘relativised.’

It is difficult to own a view point and make it absolute for the rest of the world. Again, because of technology, the world has since become a dictatorship of relativism and universalism. Only when historic stereotypes are broken, will the world become a better place.

My country, Uganda, is located in the epicenter of the Great Lakes Region of Africa and is part of the wider East African Community of five countries of Uganda, Kenya, Tanzania, Rwanda and Burundi.

It has had its fare share of conflict, disease, poverty and genocide.

Through the media, most especially from the West, the rest of world is made to believe these problems are a reflection of a backward society, yet their manifestations have a root in the colonial construction of the African people as essentially backward and primitive. They also have a root in the global competition for African resources, which competition often gets ‘conflictual,’ because of a proliferation of weapons from the West that fuel disease, genocide and install dictators.

The thrill that Relativity Online brings into this debate is the fact that it will provide a rare platform where the true picture about issues and phenomena from around the globe will thrive.

Many of us in Africa have no access to the kind of medium where our continent’s story can be told.

We only do so through our own media which is of course neither believed nor acknowledged. Our media is the unfortunate beneficiary of the unprincipled divide between the ‘respected’ and ‘peripheral’ media. But this doesn’t mean Africa has no bad story. It should come out and attract criticism for that is what relativity is all about. In fact, the lobbyists and spin doctors who are paid to ‘paint’ a good picture of Africa rarely do it perfectly, surrendering a huge amount for space for the rest of the world to paint a picture they want their audiences to see.

But we cannot keep playing the blame game all the time. The Internet has turned our huge planet into a small expression on a computer screen, and will seek to break these barriers, democratize the space for expression, and acknowledge the Africans as some form of very significant species.

Africa feeds the world, most especially the West, through immigrant labor and raw materials. The West on the other hand, feeds Africa with aid and firearms. Yet the Western Media seeks to feed the world with what the West wants the rest of the world to hear; a continent of disease, corruption, dictators, famine and war.

But with technology and the invasion of cyberspace, where will these ideas and stereotypes be sold? Who will buy them?

“If you could stand in front of a group of people from the other side of the world, what would you want them to know about you and your country? What might they be surprised by?” David asked me.

This side of the world is hungry for a true picture. It wants a picture of hope, progress, opportunity and optimism about Africa. Is that too much to ask?

From Arinaitwe Rugyendo…

From Nora Fakim…

We have all heard by now how some mixed relationships work and how some fail because of cultural differences. However, what happens if you are the product of a multicultural upbringing. Who do you chose as a partner?

Do you choose someone from one culture or someone with international or mixed background like yourself?

Sree Paps, an investment banker who’s lived Essex her entire life, finds it hard to choose a partner who can understand her.

She says ‘I am definitely attracted to White English men because they are the ones who I grew up with, but sometimes I‘d find myself bored because we have different interests and different ways of thinking. There have been times where I’ve found some Englishmen scared to offend me if we spoke about being Indian and there were others who had stereotypes in their heads about me and my Indian culture. With my female friends who are from an Anglo -Asian background or an Anglo mixed background like myself, we have certain jokes we make about how our strict parents dealing with us when growing up as young teenage girls and I feel like I have a connection with them. We understand each other. I am not attracted to Asian men because I never really came across many and those who I did would also be too Asian for me.’

Scott Limpard, a waiter a TGI in London, is engaged to Mauritian girl and says that being with someone from a different culture has not been a problem because he was curious about her upbringing.

Relationship expert Sarah Louise says that some mixed relationships work depending if both people are prepared to be open minded with one another. Some mixed relationships fail due to external pressures such as the family and the society.

What do you think?

From the time of Marcos to the Home of the Brave, comes a story of a cultural transplantation; a young boy taken from an unstable homeland in the Philippnes to the tough streets of Chicago. Below we are taken on the global journey that changed Staff Writer Dr. Ron Villejo forever.

Jap. Chink.  I was 9 years old and newly arrived in Chicago.  Jap.  Chink.  Racial slurs for Japanese and Chinese, that’s what some kids at school called me.  Something to do with my squinty eyes. 

∞

America was a virtual Shangri La for a Filipino boy. The Land of Milk and Honey,   America was flowing white and brown.  I also understood the figurative meaning of the phrase.  I set about to list all the toys and clothes I wanted, because in America I could have whatever I wanted to have – heady stuff, for a little boy.  I tried to get my sisters (6 and 4 years old) and brother (5 years old) to create their own list, but they noted only a handful of things.  “You can have more, you can have more,” I urged them. 

By most accounts, we had a good life in the Philippines.  Both professionals – Mechanical Engineer and Pharmacist – my parents had a house built in Parañaque, southwest of Manila.  We lived a middle-class suburban life and accordingly, I went to the nearby well-to-do Catholic all-boys school of St. John Don Bosco.  What’s more, we had two housemaids taking care of us. 

My parents, though, had a sense of a future not looking so bright. The 1960s was the presidency of Ferdinand Marcos, and they each felt that trouble was afoot.  I never knew how or when they began to plan our departure from the Philippines, but in 1968 my father’s two sisters and their families left from America in May.  We followed suit in September.  In 1972, President Marcos declared martial law.  Foresight on the part of my parents? Surely.

∞

I was a shy but playful boy on the Westside of Chicago, where there were many more Latinos than Filipinos.  An autumn cool was already in the air, and there seemed to be more cloudy days than I remembered seeing in the Philippines.  It was ideal weather for recess in the playground. 

What goes on in the playground was a microcosm of what was to come for us children.  All that made living delightful was there – the running, the climbing, and the jumping.  In fact, play was an entire language for us; the groan from exerting on the monkey bars; the screaming laughter from some sort of chase; the soft thud of falling down. No need for words, really.

Jap.  Chink.  In the playground, I soon learned to retort, “I’m gonna kick your ass!”

My older cousins taught me that, as they, too, were subjected to such slurs.  “I’m gonna kick your ass!” 

I kept saying it, until it stopped feeling awkward and stupid to say. 

∞

Life in Chicago was a far cry from our spacious home in Parañaque.  For the first few months, we were amongst three families living in a three-bedroom flat.  The three sets of parents – mine, my two aunts and their husbands – each staked out a bedroom.  We children – a total of 14 in the household, with a wide range in age – mostly slept on the living and dining room floor. 

It was fun for a while, but the cramped quarters led the cousins to fight amongst ourselves; never mind the other kids at school. 

“I’m gonna kick your ass!” 

Remarkably, it must’ve worked.  Soon thereafter, I heard Jap and Chink very little.  Shy or not, I saw clearly that there was value in being tough. 

              ∞

 Better than being tough, I found that the real ticket into social circles and the approval that comes with it was my academics.  I was a smart boy.  I came to learn that Philippine curriculum was more advanced than that of America.  There, children go from elementary school to high school – that is, from 6th grade to high school.  In America, there were 7th and 8th grades to navigate, before high school.  So, instead of 18 years old, many Filipinos are in the university at 16 years old.  So the curriculum, from early on, was geared along such a timeline.

Cool, totally cool. 

∞

I remember a boy named, Raul, a Puerto Rican.  A smallish boy – a gangbanger – he had a clutch of boys in the neighborhood.  Thankfully, I was never part of this. Curiously, he took a liking for me.  He sort of came into my circle. (Well, not really, as I had no circle.)  For instance, I’d go home for lunch after which he’d come by our apartment building and wait outside for me, so that he could walk me back to school.  Somehow, I felt safe and proud to be friends with him.

Raul wasn’t a very bright boy.  This, mixed with a troublesome nature, made him the butt of even the teacher’s awful jokes and derisions in class.  “Raul, you have no class!” 

So, there it was, I understood it.  Without his ever demanding anything of me, I helped him with his schoolwork – the stuff of friendship.  I got the protection that probably helped me stay out of trouble, in countless, unknown instances.  He got a better footing with his academics.         

Again, not much talking about it, Raul and I learned lessons for a lifetime. 

∞

 “I’m gonna kick your ass!” was so effective, yet so ineffective at the same time. 

 More than 40 years have passed, and since those fateful first months in Chicago I have very rarely been slurred upon by others.  Maybe it has to do with the toughness and confidence I’ve kept building up over years.  Maybe it has to do with the several relationships and circles I’ve chosen to put myself in.  Maybe it has to do with my smarts.  Who knows?

You see, here’s the thing.  Jap and Chink still reverberate within me.  Why?

Filipinos, by and large, don’t have very strong self-esteem.  Today we’re spread around the world, but more often than not, you’ll find us to be more deferential than assertive, more serving than commanding, more friendly than tough-ass.  Why?

For centuries, the Philippines were under colonial rule – by the Spaniards largely, but the Chinese and Americans figure prominently into this.  The northern part of the Philippines was their stronghold, and they came in when the economic and social fiber of development was still in its nascent stages.  More than just neglect to build the economic foundation of the local people, they actually dismantled it!  For example, Chinese merchants got small-time farmers to sell rice, below its value.  Then, in turn, they sold it at above this value.  

Imagine cutting off a baby’s feet, before he can even walk!

That’s what happened.  We were duly servants in our own home.  Invisible, in a similar vein as author Ralph Ellison posed the Black American.   

Yes, by the late 1800s, the ongoing stirrings of rebellion in the country led to the formation of a national identity (albeit roughshod and patchwork).  The Philippines gained its independence.

But still, why is our self-esteem generally still low, more than a hundred years later? 

My take on this:  This bit about independence is a pipe dream.  The 1900s was the era of the Americans.  Their sheep’s clothing was liberator, which hid the wolf of oppressor underneath.  More powerful than the Spaniards, I believe, the Americans entered our brain (e.g., through books and television) – and planted themselves within our tongue (i.e., through language, Filipinos became one of the best English-speaking Asians in the world). 

The Americans more or less just left, but I argue that we’re still an oppressed lot.  By whom?  By the longtime wealthy, powerful families in politics and business.  One learns not to mess around with them, because if someone does, they’ll see that corruption is the least of your worries.  One will literally put their life in danger.  My parents must’ve known this.  

I challenge any of my kababayan (fellow Filipino) to win me over with the notion that Filipinos are independent.  He or she will fail.  Today we are still under colonial rule. 

∞

Shame is a powerful social, behavioral tool in Philippine culture.  It’s a way to command obedience from children by parents and teachers – and from everyday citizens by those in power.

In fact, oddly enough, to feel shame was a sort of badge of honor amongst Filipinos.  So much so that for a child to be scolded with walang hiya (shameless) was doubly shaming! 

For a non-Filipino, this can be a maddening, twisted thing.  I’d agree.

Jap.  Chink.  This made me profoundly ashamed. 

The slur wasn’t even the fucking right nationality!  How odd and cruel can children be!  Damn it, didn’t they know I was not Japanese or Chinese.  It was as if I didn’t deserve the honor of being kicked in the gut with my own nationality.  Instead, it was like having my gut ripped out of me!  More than just invisible, I was now hollow. 

Talk about self-esteem.  Walang hiya.  Talk about shame.  How deep can you go with your nth power? 

∞

Jap.  Chink.  Oh, I can forgive.  But never, ever forget.