Comments on: The Problem Lies Within

By: fatima

fatima — Sat, 03 Apr 2010 13:26:51 +0000

the article listed is done after having complete negtive aspsct to show saudi as a Bad place,cant u see how many hindus and christians come and enjoy from years spending complete life span here in saudi,why do they stay its not only beacause of money its because they enjoy and spend a lot of time with their husbands if discos or pubs used to be as in america no lady as in UAE and USA would be a virgin which just hppens as in other countries exposing last inch of her body to anyone provocating and as if asking all to have sex with them.do u feel this is good in saudi the lady wear abhaya so that she is not provakating othes and she loves her dignity.i am from india and i love to be in saudi .we have very many good options to spend our time other than watching stupid movies and spending time in disco and alcoholic bars which all ladies hate foe their hubbys to be in and end their life on footpath……

By: admin

admin — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 11:40:36 +0000

I’m not sure what you’re saying above to be honest. Of course women, or men, who study religion or do charity work are not oppressed. I think you misinterpreted things.

Also, when you say, “You are looking at the Islamic society with western measures” are you saying that Islam cannot be accessed through the Western Perspective? Just curious…

Lastly, no matter what the perspective, everyone will always have their own interpreetation of life. None of which are about being right or wrong, all of which are about the multiplicity of perspective.

By: rmrajab

rmrajab — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 21:26:12 +0000

1) So, women who study religion or are involved in charity work believe in their oppression! I really can’t see the link here. I study religion and I am an active charity person, but I am not oppressed at all. I have a job, a car and I travel abroad every summer to do my graduate studies. I am a Muslim and so is my husband. I chose to wear the Hejab as a form of personal religious commitment at the age of 26 and I was not by any means FORCED to take that step. Again, not all women who do that are oppressed and it’s a very limited prospective to make a link between oppression and studying religion or joining charity activities.
2) If you see that the idea of Hijab is ironic, I will have to say that you are looking at the Islamic society with western measures. It is unfair to look at the culture or traditions of a society using the measures or criteria of another.
3) What do you mean by ‘more broad interpretation of Islamic texts’?

By: Free CAT

Free CAT — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 15:49:52 +0000

I am an Algerian woman and I have a good friend who lives in Saudi. We are not here to judge if Saudi Arabia is a good place to live. One thing I am sure of, its difficult to survive in Saudi Arabia for a woman, unlike the rest of the Middle East and no one can deny that. I totally respect the experiences of Al Nafjan, as I’ve heard many similiar stories from my friend. The situation is getting somewhat better in Riyadh, but we can’t deny what happepend as described by AL Nafjan, as this kind of stuff happens sometimes. Most importantly, each of us has their own individual experiences.

I also have a small comment regarding the book “Girls of Riyadh.” I have read the book and fully agree with the stories. RMRAJAB, don’t you think that these stories are real? Don’t you think that many men in the Middle East will not marry a woman that they have had an affair with beforehand? I don’t think one can deny this fact, as it is there. Most especially, with GCC men. With that said, the book also mentions that some men are really good and end up marrying these girls who were abandoned by their lovers. This shows there are good men too. Regardless, I think the book was a wake up call for many, and the reaction to the work revealed that the writer touched a senstive nerve. Many were critical of the author and I for one, cannot understand why.

In the end , those who critizise what’s happening in this region are not disloyal to who they are. I am so proud to be a Middle Eastern woman. I just want things to be better and to have more freedom to speak the truth.

By: admin

admin — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 15:02:07 +0000

Please go back and read over the comments made earlier. There were as follows: "Questioning whether of not the work was a piece of fiction is a small and limiting way to look at things." No one here at RELATIVITY discounted your perspective of Saudi ideology as limited. We respect all opinions here. What was described as limted, however, was the suggestion that Al Nafjan's work is a piece of fiction, just because you did no agree with what she said. This is what I addressed; this is what needs to be addressed. There is NO fiction here on RELATIVTY OnLine, only perspective, hers, yours, mine. Everyone has the right to offer their own take, but no one should accuse the other of making things up... Check out some other interesting reading about the power of cultural ideology and thanks again for stopping by, as debate makes the world go round!

By: rmrajab

rmrajab — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 14:26:20 +0000

Just as you said, “I could just as easily call three people and ask them if they have ever seen a ghost, and then conclude whatever it is they say as the status quo.” which also applies to the story published as an incident that happened to an individual a year ago. Judging at perspectives that you agree with as a reality that needs to be revealed and on other opposing perspectives as ‘limited’ doesn’t create a perfect image of multiplicity, does it?

By: admin

admin — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 09:22:30 +0000

I wanted to note that the above abaya raid took place last year, and those same places are now once again selling decorative abayas. It was my call as Editor to remove the date, but when looking at the above comment it seems to have caused some confusion. Make no mistake, this story in no way represents an “exaggeration” and DID very much happen…

I also wanted to respond to the comment above. I have only been in the Gulf for six years, but I already know what was policy a week ago is often not the case a week later. Things are never consistent here, and that’s why I am surprised an Egyptian, born and raised in the Middle East, wouldn’t take that into consideration.

Another thing to note… just because one person and three of her friends did not “see” what was reported by RELATIVTY OnLine’s Al Nafjan, doesn’t make her work untrue. The experiences of four people can hardly be called anything, but isolated. I could just as easily call three people and ask them if they have ever seen a ghost, and then conclude whatever it is they say as the status quo. Questioning whether of not the work was a piece of fiction is a small and limiting way to look at things.

In the end, this is the mission of RELATIVTY OnLine, to reveal the multiplicity of perspective, (sometimes through limited perspectives) to show that one experience does not work as a stand in for all, that it is the duty of each and every one of us to be open to experiences and ideas other than our own, so as better understand both ourselves and the world around us.

An individual’s experience is not a work of fiction, but a celebration of the autonomous experience of living a human life… Revel in this, don’t resist it. In the end, it’s what makes us who we are…

By: rmrajab

rmrajab — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 15:53:21 +0000

I’m an Egyptian who was brought up in Riyadh. Although I haven’t been to Saudi for more than 10 years, I have to say that I could sense the exaggeration in your writing immediately. I read ‘Girls of Riyadah’ last summer and I have a feeling that you are somehow influenced by the style of the writer. Yet, I don’t think this is meant to be a fictional piece of writing, is it? Although I would never think of living in KSA again, I know that things have been improving gradually.

After reading your post today, I called three friends, two Egyptians and a Saudi, who live in Riyadh, Madinah and Dammam. They all confirmed that the whole story about the Abaya raids and the plain Abayas being forced upon women is absolutely new to them! The two ladies living in Riyadh confirmed that they can wear colorful Abayas and don’t even have to cover their hair inside malls if they didn’t feel like it. They even told me that some Syrian and Lebanese ladies wear the traditional colorful long coats.

I believe that Stories like the one you have here with such exaggeration are mostly misinterpreted by people who haven’t been to Saudi. I also believe that reserved women are not oppressed and that it is a choice most of the time. I strongly believe that they are much better than western women who I HAVE SEEN get wasted and drunk, touched by strangers in pubs and bars, by choice; these FREE women are not any more respected either.

What do you think?